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In previous episodes, we discussed the importance of LGBTQ+ characters in TV and film and how being our authentic selves can manifest true representation in the media. As part of this increase in LGBTQ+ portrayals, Christmas movies have begun featuring gay characters and storylines. In this episode, we’re taking a look at some of my favorite gay Christmas movies, which include furry handcuffs, awkward family dynamics, and holiday setups. Support the show Get Your Merch
While the holiday season is typically viewed as a joyful time, the pressure of gift-giving, traveling, and spending time with loved ones can cause stress. For the LGBTQ+ community, this time of year can also serve as a reminder of their strained relationships with family, which can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation. In this episode, we’re navigating the LGBTQ+ community’s complicated relationship with the holidays and discussing tips to get through these difficult times. Addition.…
Since 1984, the gay best friend has been a staple character in movies and TV, often being portrayed as sexless and sassy. However, this stereotype—while often thought to be innocent—can actually be harmful and damaging. In this episode, we discuss the origins of the gay best friend trope and cover the negative impact it can have on gay men. Additional Resources: Gay Best Friend (Urban Dictionary)A History of the Gay Best Friend in Film and TVGay Best Friend: A Letter to Straight People from.…
For gay men, humor has played a central role in their resiliency and helped get them through tough times. However, one form of humor, self-deprecating, can become a problem and may actually signify deeper issues. In this episode, we’re discussing the role self-esteem and humor play as a coping mechanism for stressful emotions, signs that our self-deprecating jokes may be negatively impacting how we view ourselves, and how we can break this cycle. Additional Resources: Self-Deprecating Defin.…
From social media to cover models, society has an obsession with body image, which we all struggle with. But for gay men, our bodies tend to be objectified and labeled to define our worth. In this episode, we’re discussing why gay men tend to obsess over their bodies, the negative impacts this has had on our physical and mental health, and how we can treat ourselves and our bodies with kindness. Additional Resources: What are Eating Disorders?Eating Disorder StatisticsGay Men and Body Image.…
The term gaydar, a colloquialism referring to the intuitive ability of a person to assess another’s sexual orientation, has been thrown around casually in the media and among the gay community. However, is there any truth to this concept? In this episode, we take a look at the early origins of gaydar, the science behind the phenomenon, and how advancements in technology may be able to identify a person’s sexual orientation from a photo. Additional Resources Gaydar Definition (Urban Dictiona.…
In America, there has been a decrease in the number of teenagers who’ve received formalized sex education over the years. And for LGBTQ+ youth, inclusive sex education is practically nonexistent. In this episode, we’re taking a look at the current state of sex education in America, the lack of inclusive education for LGTQ+ youth, and how we can be advocates for inclusive, formalized sex education. Additional Resources: The State of Sex Education in America in 2022The 2019 National School Cl.…
At the start of a romantic relationship, it’s exciting to receive positive affirmations and affection from your partner. However, if this affection becomes exaggerated and excessive, it can lead to a manipulative cycle of abuse. In this episode, we look into what love bombing is, common red flags, and how to heal after being love bombed. Additional Resources: Love Bombing (Psychology Today)Spotting Narcissistic Love Bombing: What It Is — and Isn’tIdealize, Devalue, Discard: The Dizzying Cyc.…
The history of horror goes back more than 250 years and has depicted queer themes since its origins. From Frankenstein to Freddy Krueger, horror has always been queer. In this episode, we’re taking a look at the history of the horror genre, queer coded representation in horror literature and film, and modern-day depictions of queer characters. Additional Resources: Britannica - Horror StoryGothic LiteratureThe History of Horror is GayGuessing the Mould: Homosocial Sins and Identity in Horac.…
On October 8, 1998, a 21-year-old college student was picked up from a gay bar, tortured, and murdered because of his sexuality in a state that had no hate crime laws to protect him. More than twenty years later, we continue to remember his life and legacy. In this episode, we discuss the brutal murder of Matthew Shepard, the United States’ reaction, and the impact this tragic event had in bringing about stricter hate crime legislation. Additional Resources: Matthew ShepardMatthew Shepard, .…
Many of us grew up knowing we were different than our peers, feeling like being “other” and fearing rejection at an early age. Therefore, it’s no surprise that gay men experience increased rates of anxiety compared to their straight peers. In this episode, we’re taking a look at anxiety disorders, unique factors that negatively impact gay men’s mental health, and strategies we can implement to better manage our stress. Additional Resources: National Alliance on Mental Illness: Anxiety Disor.…
Previously, we discussed our iconic pop queens and how their songs typically fit into distinct categories that hit an emotional button that appeals to gay men. In this episode, we kick off the inaugural Gay Icons deep dive with none other than…Kylie Minogue. The highest-selling female Australian artist of all time, Kylie’s career has spanned five decades and taught us how to be vulnerable and resilient. Additional Resources: Episode 04. Pop Icons and Their Gay Emotional AppealGay Icons: My .…
It’s no secret that cities are typically more tolerant of the LGBTQ+ community, and a larger city allows for greater opportunities in general, as well as a larger dating pool. But how did the iconic gay neighborhoods we all know and love come to be? In this episode, we're taking a look at the history of gay villages, their core themes that attract LGBTQ+ people, and how gayborhoods have fallen victim to gentrification. Additional Resources: Between World Wars, Gay Culture Flourished In …
We’re all familiar with the F word (rhymes with maggot) and, unfortunately, we’ve probably been called it at some point in our lives. But where did this slur come from? In this episode, we’re taking a look into the etymology of the word and discussing its reclamation by some in the LGBTQ+ community. Additional Resources: Oxford English DictionaryThe Fa-Word: An Insulting Slur In the SpotlightThe Hobo : The Sociology of the Homeless ManInfo and Pics on "The F Word"...The New York Ti…
We previously talked about the concept of interpersonal vulnerability and why it can be harder for gay men to open up to a significant other. However, connection is an integral part of life—especially when it comes to romantic relationships. In this episode, we’re going deeper by discussing the importance of connecting with your partner through building emotional intimacy. Additional Resources: Emotional Intimacy, Sexual Desire, and Sexual Satisfaction Among Partnered Heterosexual MenHow to.…
It’s been seven months since Russia invaded Ukraine, which has had global repercussions. However, an often-overlooked area of this tragic situation is the threat this invasion imposes upon LGBTQ+ Ukrainians. In this episode, we’re taking a look at LGBTQ+ rights in Ukraine and the unique impacts the Russian invasion has had on LGBTQ+ Ukrainians. Additional Resources: State-sponsored Homophobia: A World Survey of Laws Prohibiting Same-Sex Activity Between Consenting Adults Justice Minist...
This past spring, Florida made headlines for its Parental Rights in Education Act, informally referred to as the Don’t Say Gay bill. While this legislation is disturbing, Florida is not the first state to implement such a bill. In fact, approximately 20 other states implemented similar Don’t Say Gay bills between January and April 2022. In this episode, we’re taking a look at what the Florida Parental Rights in Education Act entails, the history of similar legislation, and how we can take ac…
In between the politics of the Stonewall Riots and the AIDS pandemic, disco emerged as a haven for gay men to escape the confines of heterosexuality. In this episode, we’re taking a look at the history of disco, its queer roots, and how its legacy continues through today’s pop music – despite bigoted anti-disco movements in the late seventies. Additional Resources: Turn the Beat Around: The Secret History of DiscoLast Night a DJ Saved My Life: The History of the Disc JockeyArts in America: .…
With all the shirtless, thirst pics on dating apps, it’s easy to get *ahem* distracted. But we must stay focused on attracting the right kinds of guys into our life. In this episode, we’re going to reflect on the qualities we're attracted to in a potential partner and the power of manifestation so we can improve our dating lives. Additional Resources: Can Single People 'Manifest' a New Partner?Support the show Get Your Merch
In 1960s New York City, the Mafia needed a place to conduct business without police detection and gay men needed a safe space to socialize without being arrested. The result: the Genovese family ended up controlling the majority of gay bars in Greenwich Village, which was emerging as a gay hub at the time. In this episode, we’re diving into this unlikely partnership that eventually led to the exploitation of the gay community. Additional Resources: Stonewall Riots: Coming Out in the Streets.…
The word “ally” gets tossed around frequently, but what does it actually mean? In this episode, Cheyenne Filipczyk joins us to discuss what it means to be an LGBTQ+ ally and how we can advocate for others in the community. Additional Resources: What is an LGBTQIA+ Ally, and How Can I Be a Good One?10 Ways to Be an Ally & a FriendQuiz: What Do You Know About Gay Rights?There is Literally No Way You're Going to Pass This Quiz if You're StraightSupport the show Get Your Merch<…
John Bowlby’s attachment theory suggests that humans are born with a need to form a close emotional bond. For gay men, social stressors, such as discrimination and rejection, can negatively impact their attachment system and result in unhealthy romantic attachments. In this episode, we take a look at the four distinct attachment styles and their respective characteristics so we can better understand our own attachment patterns. Additional Resources: Attachment TheoryRomantic Love Conceptual.…
Amidst the AIDS pandemic, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) banned gay and bisexual men from ever being eligible to donate blood to protect people receiving blood transfusions from the possibility of getting infected with HIV. Almost 30 years later, science has provided us with new drugs to better protect ourselves from HIV exposures and technology to improve HIV testing by providing quicker and more accurate results. Today, men who have sex with men must defer from sex for three months…
Growing up in a heteronormative society, we may have learned to believe that our gay identity was a weakness. As a result, we’ve developed the need to be perfect to manage the feeling of being an outsider. In this episode, we’re discussing what perfectionism in gay men looks like and how we can learn to accept our imperfections. Additional Resources: Perfectionism7 Signs You’re Too Much of a PerfectionistNine Little-Known Signs of PerfectionismGay Shame: 5 Ways Gay Men CompensateAsk Adam: W.…